


This Heart Can Never Heal

by silvermoonwulf



Category: SK8 the Infinity (Anime)
Genre: Angst, Breakup, M/M, MatchaBlossom, Timeskip, adult kojiro and kaoru, joe and cherry, post breakup
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-17 06:47:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29837637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silvermoonwulf/pseuds/silvermoonwulf
Summary: It's been years since they broke up but can a chance encounter at a coffee shop save them?
Relationships: Nanjo Kojiro | Joe/Sakurayashiki Kaoru | Cherry Blossom
Comments: 1
Kudos: 33
Collections: MatchaBlossom





	This Heart Can Never Heal

Cherry woke up tired. More than he usually did.

He knew he shouldn’t have had that one extra drink last night. But he indulged himself because the night seemed longer than usual and for the first time in a long time, something had reminded him of Joe.

It was silly actually.

They had broken up a year after high school when Joe had decided that he wanted to stay in Italy even after his undergrads. The long distance had already started taking a toll on their relationship by then so they believed a breakup was the best thing for the both of them. And Cherry had done everything in his power to rid himself of everything Joe.

But that stupid soft toy Joe had won for him at the lantern festival when they were in high school was something Cherry couldn’t throw away. So he had stuffed it at the back of his closet where it would be forgotten.

That was until last night when he was looking for his winter coat inside his closet when his eyes fell on the pink gorilla toy.

Joe had particularly chosen that one because Cherry used to call Joe a gorilla more often than he could count and because the pink was very close to Cherry’s hair color.

“It’s has something from the both of us” Joe had said as he handed Cherry the toy.

Cherry didn’t know why he still kept it though.

Maybe one day he’d be able to part with it and it wouldn’t feel like someone had reached into his chest and pulled his heart out.

Cherry got out of his bed and was about to go into the kitchen when he felt the onset of a headache.

“I should stop drinking” he reminded himself like he did very often, but never followed through.

He looked around for some hangover medicine but there was none.

Coffee, Cherry needed coffee. He looked around for that too but then he remembered that grocery shopping was due and there was literally nothing inside his house that could help with his headache.

He quickly showered and changed into a fresh pair of clothes before heading to his favorite coffee shop that was a few miles away from his house.

The sun seemed brighter than usual and the world louder than ever but he had no other choice. If he needed energy to sustain throughout the day, he needed his daily dose of caffeine.

Driving for about fifteen minutes, Cherry pulled his car outside the tiny shop that was fairly new and thus, didn’t have many walkins, something Cherry was thankful for at the moment.

There was a new boy working part time behind the counter who greeted Cherry as he walked in.

“Shh” Cherry said, pulling his finger over his lips. “I’m hungover” he whispered.

“Oh” the boy whispered back. “What can I get you?”

Cherry sighed. “Anything that can cure my headache”

The young boy smiled and Cherry looked at the name tag on his shirt. ‘Langa’ it said.

He paid quickly and Langa thanked him.

“Can you please bring it to my table, Langa?”

“Yes, definitely sir”

“Thanks” Cherry said and the whispering game was over when he walked to the back of the café and took the seat on the furthest corner that wasn’t under the sunlight.

The day had just begun but Cherry already felt like he was exhausted. He buried his face in the safe confines of his arms and rested on the table for a while.

His heart felt heavy and his mind restless. Why did he have to think of Joe at all? It had been six years since they went their separate ways. He didn’t know where he was or what he was up to. They hadn’t even spoken since the breakup. So why did Joe still have such a strong hold on Cherry? Why couldn’t he just move on like other people did?

Truth was, Cherry would give anything for Joe to appear suddenly and tell him that he was stupid and that he still loved Cherry. Truth was, Cherry had tried to move on many times but there was no one who could replace Joe. Truth was, Cherry still loved him with all his heart.

“Kaoru?”

Fuck. Did someone recognize him? Cherry was hoping for some peaceful time but apparently it wasn’t in his card today.

He lifted his head up gently, to see who it was.

Cherry froze.

It was Joe.

In the café. In Japan. What was happening?

“Ko… Kojiro?”

“Oh my god, it _is_ really you” Joe said, walking over for a hug.

Cherry didn’t move. This wasn’t real, was it? Cherry was sure he was dreaming because how could Joe be in Japan suddenly?

And if he really was, why didn’t he tell Cherry before coming?

When Cherry didn’t return the hug, Joe gave out am empathetic smile. “Can I sit?”

Slowly, Cherry nodded.

“I can’t believe I ran into you here” Joe said, sounding delighted. “How have you been?”

 _Miserable without you_ , is what Cherry wanted to say. “I’ve been good” he said instead. “And you?”

“Oh, I am great” Joe beamed. “Do you come here often?”

Cherry didn’t understand the situation. There had been nothing but radio silence for six years and now Joe was sitting here, talking to him like nothing had happened. Like the past six years didn’t exist and like they were both absolutely fine.

Or maybe everything _was_ fine and it was only Cherry who was still stuck in a time that was long lost?

“Yeah” Cherry said, answering Joe’s question. “I come here often”

“So what have you been up to?” Joe asked in return.

“How long have you been in Japan?” Cherry asked because he couldn’t keep it within himself anymore.

Something shifted in Joe’s face. “A week” he said in a low voice.

“And you were just planning to not tell me?”

“It’s not like that” Joe offered. “I just didn’t think you’d want to see me”

“And if you hadn’t run into me here, you would have just left?”

Joe shook his head, “I am back for good”

_Oh god!_

Joe was back, permanently.

“I was just…” Joe continued, “trying to find the right time to tell you…”

For some reason, Joe looked away from Cherry and Cherry didn’t know what he meant.

“Right time to tell me what?”

Joe scratched his forehead, laughing nervously. “I got married last year” he said.

At first, Cherry thought he had misheard but when he noticed the ring on Joe’s finger, his world shattered.

Cherry felt like he couldn’t breathe.

So it really was just him who was still stuck in the past while Joe had moved on.

Cherry wanted to laugh at his stupidity. He wanted to cry at the cruel game fate had just played. He wanted to run away from Joe and go back in time and tell Joe that he didn’t want to break up and that he wanted to make things works or at least try.

But none of that seemed possible.

Instead, Cherry mustered the courage to give a curt smile. “Congratulations” he said, fighting to keep his voice steady.

“Thanks”

“Can I ask who?”

“Oh” Joe said with a bright smile. “It’s Andrea. Do you remember him from my uni?”

Cherry blinked as his heart sank.

Of course he remembered Andrea. He was the reason Joe and Cherry had their first big fight after he’d moved to Italy. Cherry could just tell from the photos Joe would send that Andrea liked him. But Joe would always dismiss it, saying Cherry was overthinking or was probably jealous.

This felt like a betrayal and Cherry felt foul and dirty for some reason. This was worse than Joe telling him that he had gotten married because Andrea? The guy who had forced them to argue over and over and over until they had broken up? Cherry felt like he had been cheated on.

Cherry didn’t know what to say anymore. He didn’t want to complain and show that he was still hung up on Joe and he didn’t have the courage to ask him upfront if he was already cheating on him with Andrea when they broke up. So all he did was nod.

Was the air in the room getting scarcer because Cherry swore he felt deprived.

Just then, Langa appeared with a tray and his coffee.

 _Thank god_.

Cherry hurriedly stood up and grabbed the coffee. “Thanks Langa” he said and turned to Joe. “Good luck with your marriage” he said and rushed off, not answering to Joe calling his name out repeatedly, asking him to stop.

He couldn’t stay there anymore. So he left, not even sure where he was going.

Cherry drove for hours and hours, forcing himself to not cry over Joe and what he’d told him. He wouldn’t be so weak for someone who had pushed him out of his life years ago. Who had replaced him with someone else and who had looked at him like they were strange acquaintances.

Cherry had wished for Joe to appear suddenly and now that he had, Cherry wished he didn’t at all. He wished he was still in Italy and wouldn’t have ever come back.

For six years, Cherry had kept Joe and their relationship alive inside of him and it turned to dust in just a few minutes.

Joe had moved on, and Cherry supposed it was time for him to move on too.

It was hours after sundown that Cherry returned to his house.

The first thing he did was dive back into his closet and retrieve the pink gorilla toy.

Picking it up, Cherry gave it one final look.

There were nights, few but terrifyingly torturous when Cherry couldn’t go to sleep unless he had the soft toy neatly wrapped in his arms. But he knew he would have to learn to live without it now. For the sake of his own sanity, at least.

“This is goodbye” Cherry said. “Forever”

After he got rid of the toy, which he sent to the pile of items to be donated, he curled into his bed and finally let his tears flow, hoping that once the tears had dried out, he wouldn’t cry over that one particular man ever again.

Maybe in another life, Cherry would be the man Joe wanted in his life. Maybe in another time, they would be together.

As Cherry cried himself to sleep, all he could think of was the gaping hole in his heart, that would probably never be healed.

**Author's Note:**

> I am living with Matchablossom brain rot and I am not complaining.
> 
> Sorry for the angst I just needed to get it out of my system but I hope it wasn't so bad.
> 
> Find me on twitter here [Toorutoshi](https://twitter.com/toorutoshi)


End file.
